Hello. What's happened to everyone. THis conversation seems to have petered out.
Anyway. Here is the first (very short) draft of the idea i posted here a couple of weeks ago. I've just shown it to my friend Alex and he was delightfully positive about it, so slag it off to hell. I don't mind a bit.
Areas that I think need work are: the setting - is Soho too specific? the names - obviously not quite there yet. the end - i would like to bring the colours thing back, but can't quite think how to.
And let's face it, you may have given up on this site altogether, in which case this preamble is completely redundant. If not, email me with what you think, if you like. Hope it scrolls.
Polly.
14
We see a 14-year-old girl asleep in a single bed.
Girl 1 (v/o)
Since I was little, this thing happens when I’m falling asleep. If I hear a noise, behind my closed eyes I see a flash.
A car starting outside makes a pinkish blob. A door closing in the house makes a brownish ripple. A plate smashing makes a bright white flash.
Hear smash of the plate and voices shouting.
Her eyes open suddenly as she is woken and she breathes in quickly.
Cut to
Night exterior.
Girl 1 clips a headlight to her pushbike and cycles off down the quiet road.
She has tears rolling down her cheeks.
Cut to
Night exterior.
Girl 1, now with dry eyes, rings a doorbell. Boy 1 answers.
Boy 1
Alright?
Girl 1
Hi.
Awkward pause
Boy 1
Where are we going then?
Cut to both of them on the bike – her on the saddle and him standing and peddling. She is holding on to his shoulders. They both do a little
Woohoo!
and wave at their own reflections as they pass the Prudential building on the corner before Gower St. They are heading into Soho.
Cut to
A long queue outside a shit-looking Soho nightclub. As we look along the queue it is obvious how much younger, smaller and more excited Boy 1 and Girl 1 are than the rest of them.
Cut to
Scary bouncer
Date of birth?
Girl 1
30th of May nineteen eighty er th..two.
Scary bouncer
Piss off.
Cut to
Back on the bike they abuse the bouncer as they pass him (he doesn’t even notice).
Girl 1: (shouts) Lame boy.
Boy 1: Lame!
Cut to
Cycling through Trafalgar Square
Boy 1: (to Nelson) Lame!
Cut to
Cycling through Piccadilly Circus
Both: (roaring at the huge illuminated signs) Laaame!
Cut to
The steps of a bombed out church.
Boy 1 finishes rolling a joint. They both look round.
Boy 1
Fuck. What was that?
Cut to
Back on the bike Boy 1 hands the joint to Girl 1 behind him as he carries on pedalling. She is looking over her shoulder as she taps the ash off the end and stretches her legs out either side of the bike.
Cut to
They are both getting off the bike
Boy 1
Stay here then.
He disappears. She is left holding the bike.
Cut to
Boy 1 returns eating a bagel.
Girl 1
Oi save half for me.
Boy 1 produces a loaf from inside his jacket. And another two bagels from each jacket pocket. And half a French stick from up his sleeve. And, for his last trick, an iced doughnut from his back pocket. By now they are both laughing. Girl 1 pulls the end off the French stick.
Girl 1
Ooh it’s still warm.
Cut to
Boy 1
Night then.
Girl 1
(indicating sunrise) Morning then.
They don’t kiss.
The end.
